Dear Aunty Aurora,
My name is Justin and I seriously need advice. I am not very good at writing things like this, so I will keep it short. I love my girlfriend very dearly and I have been thinking of settling down with her. The only issue we never seem to agree on is her dress sense. Personally I love looking good and fashionable but my girlfriend is so carefree about her appearance to the point that she can go with our making her hair for months. I have tried to be understanding and overlook it but it is beginning to affect our relationship. Places that I would have naturally loved to go with her I end up going alone or not going at all because I know she won’t dress appropriately for the occasion. The last time I tried to touch the subject with her, she didn’t take it well. She accused me of being ashamed of her and not loving her the way she is. Please, what else can I do ensure we don’t continue like this?
Bearing in mind that you saw her the way she was before choosing to enter into a relationship with her, I would say what you need is a lot of patience and tact. No woman would take being told she is not attractive or fashionable well from anyone and especially not from her man. I may not be sure how you discussed the issue with her but for her to feel that you are ashamed of her then your communication wasn’t effective. Fashion may not be your woman’s priority but there are ways you can get to make an effort at looking good. She will definitely not transform into a peacock overnight but with assistance and support from you, I believe she will blossom. Another thing to note is if she can actually afford the kind of fashion revolution you want in her life. If not encourage her with a gift from time to time to remind her that you are a team and you only have her best interest at heart. Also avoid comparing her to other ladies privately or to her face. The only person she has to compete with is herself and if you help her see this, she is more likely to dance to your tune. Aunty Aurora.
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Dear Aunty Aurora,